Wednesday 23 March 2016

Patience, Acceptance, Time

Right from the very start of creating this blog I expressed that I've wanted to be completely honest. I want to do so to hopefully help those who read this in one way or another; as well as to help myself, especially when faced with difficult times.

Today I am going to write this post from the centre of my heart. I'm going to be completely and utterly honest with how I am currently feeling, and I'm going to say straight away that at the moment I'm feeling a bit rubbish. 

There isn't one specific reason as to why, just lots of little reasons bundled together like a big dark cloud overshadowing me. 

I'm pretty sure we all have times like this, and don't get me wrong, I do believe that I will get through it, but that doesn't mean the 'getting through it' bit is ever easy.

So why am I writing this post? Well keeping honesty in mind, I honestly needed to let out how I'm feeling. I want to speak out to help those who feel how I currently feel, and if you do to let you know that together we will get through the tough times. We will. 

Today I want to write specifically about the 'getting through it' transition, which is an incredibly challenging process. For me, there are some days where I feel trapped in this transition, which is how I've been feeling recently. I just want the big dark cloud overshadowing to back off a bit, to give me some space, to leave me alone and just let me know what I mean?

Whilst thinking about the struggle I'm currently in, and with there not being one particular reason for why I feel how I do, I'm just not feeling in very high spirits. I really want to channel some of my low feelings into something that'll help me get through, and I've found myself thinking of three words.

Three very simple words, which I came up with off the top of my head. To me, these words have great meaning and now sum up my present focus. 

The words being patience, acceptance, time.

I came across a quote and thought it fitted in beautifully with this post and wanted to share it with you...

For a long time I've struggled with keeping calm, with being patient and with accepting that some things just take time. We all have such moments where feelings of aggravation, frustration and the urge of wanting a quick fix takes over our minds and becomes overwhelming and unmanageable. 

Right from this very second I am going to put all of my power and strength into turning my frown upside down, and to try my absolute hardest to focus on being patient and to accept that however long it may be until I'm out of this tough patch. I will get through it and I will be ok. 

Learning how to cope and manage such negative feelings isn't easy, but nor is it realistic to live letting such feelings take over. This was the case for me some years ago, and it wasn't doing me any good at all. I knew I needed to change things around and get onto a better path, to progress rather than regress.

The biggest and hardest step is making that decision of positive change and sticking to it. For me, now that this want for positive change is embedded in my mindset, I feel I have opened up so many closed doors. 

I am learning incredible strategies and coping mechanisms all of the time and I'm finding out more on how to better manage my not so good feelings and to be patient with myself. 

At the beginning I found it extremely difficult to accept that with some problems there is no quick fix. I do have days where this still upsets me, taking these last few days of me feeling not so great as an example. But with keeping the three words 'patience, acceptance and time' in my mind and using these as a focus helps calm me and ease the frustration. With keeping to this simple focus I feel my mind is clearing.

Going back to the reason for why I'm writing this post, I'd like to invite you to perhaps try out a simple focus - maybe like me with patience, acceptance and time or make up one of your own. Then, whenever you find yourself lost, frustrated, feeling down or similar remind yourself of your focus. 

For example maybe you're finding your workload too much and the amount is causing you to feel demotivated. Or perhaps you're in a similar situation to me where you feel a little stuck, and unsure of whats next, or what you'd like for your future. Or, you're just having a bad day. 

Whatever it is, whatever may be getting you down, stop, just for a moment, take a step out of the negative spiral you're in. Remind yourself of your focus, smile, breath deeply and repeat it to yourself a few times. Remind yourself that tough times never last and that the best things in life take time. 

For me, I am learning that if I give myself the time, if I am patient and accept that the best things to come are often those that take the most time. As long as I stay calm and motivated, I just know that I will get to a better place.

For many years people said to me "Em, be patient with yourself" or "Em, this is how things are at the moment, but if you give yourself time you will get to where you want to be".

For a while I didn't listen. But then one day, I just simply started to listen to these wise words and since then, I can definitely say that I feel positive changes happening all the time - even on my not so good days. Now with using my new three word focus, the more I think patience, acceptance, time the calmer and stronger I feel.

Why not try giving yourself a focus starting from right this second? Just think, what is there to loose? Better still, think of what you can accomplish with this simple focus in mind :)

And remember...

Thank you so much for reading this post.

All my love xxx

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